Thursday, April 29, 2010
Prom!!!
It's odd I never thought that would happen. I'm kind of wondering if the Apocalypse is coming or something, but....
The truth is though, I know nothing about Prom, dances or dating or anything. My Mom is freaking out about finding a dress etc. I have no idea where to even get a dress; it is crazy.
Yes... I will tell you who asked me, but seeing as nearly none of you know him, it will mean little to you: Mckay
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Music!
We didn't actually get to go to state for Jazz Band, and state for Symphonic Band is on Friday. Wish us (good) luck! I'm in full orchestra too, and that festival is on May...14th? I think...I don't actually know the date...hmmm...oh, well.
:)
Monday, April 19, 2010
Condensed Cliff Notes
Meanwhile...Allison and I were bored and looking stuff up in engineering. So, we Googled "condensed cliff notes," and these are some of my favorites:
The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer (to the tune of the Gilligan's Island theme song)
Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a voyage long,
Of pilgrims headed 'cross the land,
Nine and twenty strong.
The Knight was a most distinguished man,
The Skipper brave and sure,
The Doctor had a love for gold,
The Franklin was a whore.
The
The travellers, they found an inn,
The Tabard was its name;
If not for the segues of the Host,
The story would be lame.
The story would be lame.
The pilgrims set out on their course,
St. Christopher they sought;
With the Wife of
The Miller too,
The Summoner,
And the Reeve,
The Pardoner, and the rest,
To
Young Goodman Brown by Nathaniel Hawthorne
The allegorically-named Goodman Brown is GOOD. But, at the protests of his allegorically-named wife Faith, he visits the devil and unwittingly becomes BAD. Then he dies.
THE END
Bartleby the Scrivener by Herman Melville
Narrator
Bartleby, do what I tell you.
Bartleby
I would prefer not to.
(Humanity is DOOMED.)
THE END
Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon
Thomas Pynchon
A screaming thing comes across the sky. It's a V-2 rocket carrying twelve thousand pounds of symbolism, and it's coming down on your poor, deluded, postmodern head.
THE END
The Jungle by Upton Sinclair
Bad things happen. Worse things happen. Better things happen. Awful things happen. Jurgis discovers socialism and gets all happy.
THE END
War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy
Leo Tolstoy
History controls everything we do, so there is no point in observing individual actions. Let's examine the individual actions of over 500 characters at great length.
THE END
Hamlet by William Shakespeare
Hamlet
Whine whine whine...To be or not to be...I'm dead.
THE END